Is it Me?

i know i wasn't cranky. i know i wasn't depressed. i know i wasn't suicidal. i know i wasn't sad. but why am i feeling this way? i started to have those terrible anxiety attacks and having mental breakdowns during work and school is just literally fucked up!

i am not even sure if i was making compromises to everything. i know i was being "normal" but i am not even sure if i was such an annoyance to people. i have no idea but this feeling caught me up in this terrible situations where i feel like i am just a trouble to people and i feel like i need to get out from their life before it's get even annoying.

i don't know....

my mind just isn't with me nor it's with me in the first place. my mind keep saying that i need to put an END to everything. delete my instagram, twitter, facebook and anything that has ME for real.

i want everything that has ME to be deleted, honestly. i hate me. i hate that i was even exist in people's lifes thinking i was really important but i wasn't. people's behaviour is just making me questions my existence and i do wonder if i am really IMPORTANT to everyone.

how i wish that one day it could just end perfectly with no one involves in this mess, getting caught by the cops just because i was dead and hoping that no one would even get into trouble because i was dead and honestly if there is a chance for me to even die and leave everyone for good, i would.