Can Women Get Depression? (Men's Guide!) #Mental Health Study Series (3)

Let's jump straight to the topic of today. If you're a guy who is in a relationship or married with someone who suffers from depression, let's understand this topic as a way to understand your partner easily. 


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Depression comes in many different forms and most affected is in women (i may be wrong, but according to my research, women suffers from depression is quite high compared to men.). Women have many life roles which includes as a mother, wife, employee, friend, healer, caregiver and the list can goes on. I guess, even if you were to list out, I can guarantee it'll be more than 3 pages of paper or notebook. The complexity of all of these roles can cause ups and downs throughout our entire life. Some of these mood changes may be due to live events. It can varies. For example :


  • Getting an argument with friends (be it close, best or a friend)
  • Hormonal issues (pregnancy, menstrual cycle)


In general, after a few days, her emotions tends to level out and she wouldn't feel down in the dumps anymore. But if your partner suffers from depression, her "down" days won't go away after few days, it can interfere with your daily activities and the relationship. This can be a debilitating cycle and can occur due to many different causes and reasons. Symptoms can last weeks, months, years and can be intermittent or a one-time occurrence. Depression affect twice the percentage in women than man and have many different contributing causes in women than it does in men.  Contributing factors include reproductive hormones, differing female responses to stress and social pressures which are unique to women life's experiences. 


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Major Depression 


Major depression is a severe form of depression where individual loses their ability to find pleasure in activities that was once considered enjoyable. In addition, it affects individual ability to work, sleep, eat in normal and effective manners and usually negatively impacts interpersonal and social relationships. With major depression, which is also known as major depressive disorder, individual state may persist for a very extended period of time and is often accompanied with low self-esteem. 


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Post-partum Depression 


This depression is a special form of depression that occurs after the birth of a baby, which is often referred to as the "baby blues". Typical symptoms of depression begins in the months of following the birth, however, in some women, they can occur while still pregnant. 


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Persistent Depressive Disorder 


Considered as a milder form of depression which is an extended depressed mood that lasts for two years or more. Major depressive disorder (which is more severe forms of depression) may still occur during persistent depressive disorder. 


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Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder 


Depression that is tied to a women's menstrual cycle. In this form of depression, severe mood swings, anxiety and negative thoughts present themselves in the week prior to the start of menstruation and it dissipates once the menstrual period begins. Depressive symptoms are severe enough to negatively impacts interpersonal relationships and interfere with daily activities. 


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Here is some of the distinguishing factors in how depressions differ between women and men includes :


  1. Women feels anxious and scared ; Men feels guarded.
  2. Women blame themselves for the depression ; Men blame others. 
  3. Women commonly feel sad, worthless and apathetic when depressed ; Men tend to feel irritable and angry. 
  4. Women are more likely to avoid conflicts when depressed ; Men are more likely to create conflicts. 
  5. Women turn to food and friends to self-medicate ; Men turn to alcohol, TV, sex or sports to self-medicate. 
  6. Women feel lethargic and nervous ; Men feel agitated and restless. 
  7. Women easily talk about their feelings of self-doubt and despair ; Men hide their feelings of self-doubt and despair, considering as a sign of weakness. 

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What Causes Depression in Women? 


There are a multitude of genetic, hormonal, psychological and social factors that comes into play when citing the cause of depression in women.

Biologically, depression runs in families, which with supporting scientific evidence that some genetic makeups are more prone to depression whereas some genetic makeups are more resistant to it. Though, environmental factors are thought to interact with genetic predispositions and that is just because individuals may be prone to depression because of individuals genes, healthy family and social relationships can increase resilience. Other biological and hormonal factors are also likely to increase individual chances of suffering from depression. Issues of pregnancy, fertility, peri-menopause, menopause and menstrual cycles increases women's risk factors of developing depression, most of these are due to hormonal imbalances and rapid fluctuations in reproductive hormones. Health problems in general especially those with chronic illness or disability can prompt depression in women, as can medical life changes such as frequent dieting and smoking cessation. 

As for psychological causes, women are more prone than men because with a tendency to be more emotional, women are more likely to rehash negative thoughts during the period of depression. While it's normal response to cry, talk with friends and also rehash why it is that individuals are in your depressive state,  research studies have shown that ruminating about depression can cause it to last longer and make it worse. In the contrast men tend to distract themselves from their depressive state which has shown to reduce the duration of symptoms. Additional psychological factors is that it affects women over men in terms of negative body images and stress-induced depression. Women are more prone to stress than men because of their increased levels of progesterone which research have been shown to prevent stress hormones from levelling out. Negative body images issues are likely to begin in adolescence and seem to be correlated with the onset of puberty in women.


Social causes such as coping skills, choices of relationships and lifestyle choices affect women differently than men. As a woman, she is more likely to develop depression from marital or relationship problem, work life balance issues, financial troubles and stressful life events, loss of loved one. 


National Institutes of Health also indicates the following which increases the risk factors of depression in women ;


  1. Death of a parent before the age of 10.
  2. Job loss.
  3. Relationship problems.
  4. Divorce.
  5. Physical or sexual abuse during childhood. 
  6. Use certain medications.
  7. History of mood disorders. 

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Sign and Symptoms


The symptoms differ from woman to women, hence it can varies. Some of the most common ones are ; 


  1. Feelings of emptiness, hopelessness, despair and sadness. 
  2. Irritability, anxiousness and guilt. 
  3. Feelings of exhaustions, severe tiredness.
  4. Loss of interest in previous pleasurable activities. 
  5. Inability to concentrate or remember details.
  6. Suicidal thoughts or attempts of suicide. 
  7. Sleep disturbances ; such as sleeping too much or too little (insomnia). 
  8. Changes in appetite ; eating too much or too little.
  9. Physical symptoms ; aches and pains, cramps, headaches, digestive issues, breast tenderness or bloating. 
  10. Lack of energy. 
  11. Feeling out of control.
  12. Mood swings and feelings of tearfulness. 
  13. Panic attacks.
  14. Feelings of tension.
  15. Disinterest in daily activities and relationships. 

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If you're a woman and suffering from depression, or if your partner suffers from depression, it is best to seek treatment right away to improve your quality of life. The first course of action should be a visit to the doctor or mental health professionals. The doctor will ask you or your partner a series of questions and also perform tests to rule out an underlying medical condition which causing your depression and to determine if certain medications might be to blame for your depressed mental state. Primary care doctor will also ask number of questions about your symptoms, like how long they last, when it started, the severity of your symptoms, how persistent they are (re-occurence rate) and your family history of depression, if there's any. If the doctor suspects that you may be suffering from depression, he or she will refer you to a mental health specialist who can formally diagnosed you and make recommendations of different treatments and see which suits you or which could help. The most common treatment is medications and therapy (I've made a post about it. You may click the title or you can click here!).

It's a MUST for you or your partner to tell the doctor that you are pregnant as certain medications may affect your growing baby. If you or your partner are depressed, your doctor may prescribe you anti-depressants to help you or your partner to cope and lessen the symptoms of depression. When taking anti-depressants, it is important for you or your partner to monitor the symptoms and note any side effects. Certain side effects can worsen depression in a small percentage of individuals. Specifically increased risk of suicidal thoughts, attempts and irritability to have found to be associated with the use of anti-depressants. Common side effects include, nausea, headaches, sleep disturbances, agitation and sexual problems. Though these side effect usually decreases over time. 

Therapy also shown to be very effective method of treatment. CBT is one of the most common forms of talk therapy, psychotherapy which is a form of treatment of depression. This method of therapy focuses on teaching new ways of thinking and coping mechanisms when feelings of depression hits. In addition, therapy is helpful in helping women to understand difficult relations and how to improve them, changing habits, that contributes to their depression. Therapy do includes one-to-one therapy, group therapy or family therapy. Family therapy is a helpful method because in some cases, family stress is also a contributing factor. Unfortunately, depression in women are often misdiagnosed and the rates are high as 50% and fewer than half women who experience major depression will ever seek treatment. Fortunately, depression shows high treatment rates and more cases of women with depressions shows improvement in their treatments hence a successful one. In addition for treatment, self-treatment also needs to play apart. Such as, don't keep your feelings bottled up ; find a support group of people you trust, stay engaged in social activities and social functions ; if possible, exercise regularly, get enough sleep ; 8 hours per night is ideal, meditate, try yoga or patrice any other relaxation techniques. 

If you, or any of your loved one suffering from depression, do know that you are not alone. Seek help for your depressed mood and if you are unsure who to contact, try the following sources such as ;


  1. Family doctors. 
  2. Employee assistance programs.
  3. Mental health centers.
  4. Social agencies. 
  5. Mental health specialist.
  6. Private clinics.
  7. State hospitals such as outpatient clinics
  8. Health maintenance organizations. 

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Also, even if today is a very bad day, I just want to let you know that you are not alone and I'm proud of you for staying strong till today. I thank you for staying strong. Remember to reward yourself for staying strong. Wherever you are and whoever you are, especially if you are reading this, I'm sending you lots of love and my support :). 

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# All sources stated above is based on my own research, my own experiences and other's experiences (which I've personally approached and asked for their experiences). I'm in no means to take over as a professional therapist. I'm not professional. I'm mainly sharing my knowledge with you as so that mental health stigmas will stop. I do not gain any profits or medals or whatever shits in sharing what I knew. Please consult the professionals or seek help from the doctor if you do notice any changes in your behavior or the people close to you, in terms of physical or mental. Please have a look at this for emergency hotline. 

For those staying overseas, please check at this list
For those staying in Singapore, please check at this list

Thank you, stay safe. 

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