Admission to MDU ward — Mood Disorder Unit

I stayed at the ward 22B for like 6 days before I transferred to MDU. I was hoping that MDU would be better than 22B considering that it's just based on mood disorder but however, it doesn't seem like it. My anxiety skyrocketed and I had a mental breakdown. That was the first in my life time, I regret coming to the ward and how I wished I could just stay at 22B instead.

The people around is just seems scary to me, the nurses, well, quite nice but not as friendly as I thought it'll be. The doctor is WAY to scary and creepy to me that I just hate him on my VERY FIRST talk session. Irony isn't it, that I hated a doctor during my very first meeting. 

I'd much prefer 22B rather than MDU though MDU is comfy as fuck, you get to watch the TV till 10:30pm unlike 22B where lights off exactly at 9pm after medication and shower time. Good thing about MDU is that the place literally is better than any ward. It's like "atas" place but rather yhan better. Each bed has their own ceiling fan hence it's a plus. I mean, I'd don't mind to stay at MDU but if only the doctor is kind and maybe, not scary imo. 

Throughout my stay, I can say that my admission in IMH brought a realization to me that I've been cruel to myself. I did not listen to my own body and mind, hence the relapse. And right now, I do still have that inch of relapse but I'm trying my best to adapt to the situation. I don't have much to say about the ward itself because I only stayed for a night and I begged the doctor to let me go home. 

And.... I got 35 days hospitalization leave. More of me staying home and my whole energy is completely drained. Fucking drained.

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Part 1 : click here

Part 2 : click here